1.05.15

It was not a nightmare, but it feels like a nightmare. Every night, i always wake up in the middle of my sleep because i dreamt of you, of her, of us. 

And although it was just a dream, it seems like a nightmare. To dream of both of you. Happy, walking hand in hand. Caressing each other. 

How I envy her, because she took my place. And how i wish all these dreams would stop, i wish both of you would stop haunting me in my sleep.

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When you love a person.

When you love a person, you share not only yourself, but your heart, your soul and the things you love. You share those things to them because you wanted them to be in your world. You wanted them to experience what it feels like to be in your world. 

So you started showing and telling them what and why you love city lights. You show and tell them why you love fireworks or street foods, or art or doodle. You start making memories like watching city lights together, blinking right before your eyes, watching fireworks flash right before your eyes, eat street foods, make doodle or art for them. 

Then they leave you.

And you end up hating the things you love because those things that you love reminds you of him. Before, when you watch the city lights and fireworks, you feel happiness. But now, whenever you watch the city lights and fireworks, it brings back a lot of painful memories. 

So you started hating those things that you love. Hoping and wishing that you could turn back the hands of time that you shared to him the things that you love.